Posts Tagged ‘The internet’

Why the Internet is Awesome and You Suck

March 18, 2008

Yeah, the internet is awesome, and yeah you do suck. Really though the title should be “Why the internet is awesome and sucks at the same time.”

Basically my blog got a hit of an internet search item the other day. The search term was “kristin proctor nude”. The next day there was another hit of the search engine, this time the search term was “kristin proctor breasts”.

I can only interpret this as someone deciding to jerk off to Kristin Proctors breasts. Failing to find sufficient fappage material and then waiting an entire day before they realised, “hey, maybe if try searching for ‘breasts’ instead of ‘nude’ I might find some more jerkoff material.

That is why the internet is awesome.

Unfortunately my sexually frustrated friend, there is a total lack of naked Kristin Proctor on the Interwebs.

That is why the internet sucks.

There is only one way that I can think of to remedy this situation. We need more naked Kristin Proctor. A lot more! But I’m willing to negotiate. So I’d like to make an open plea to Ms. Proctor. Please ma’am you have more talent in one of those fantastically fake boobies than half the chicks in hollywood. It would be a crime to waste them during your peak hot years, before waiting to display them in all their glory once you’re fat and unattractive.

Therefore I am hereby starting the “Let’s get Kristin Proctor Naked” Movement.

Stated goals of this movement are as follows:

1. Get Kristin Proctor naked
2. Videotape or photograph above nudity
3. Distribute on the Internet
4. ????
5. Profit!!!!